I hope you dance.

You ever cried while praying? I haven’t. But l imagine it is a powerful thing to want something that bad. To talk to The One who can give it to you with that much emotion. To also be able to connect to Him in that way. I have never mentioned to anyone before that l have never cried while praying or that l sometimes feel like my prayers aren’t sincere enough because l am utterly scared that they will tell me that it’s because l am a non believer. I think l am a believer. But that’s not why l am frantically typing this as l debate whether or not l should make dinner. I can always have an orange instead.

I’m just here thinking about the numbness that sometimes comes with being sad. Or the overemotion (l don’t know if that’s a word, l just hope you get my point). You know there are some days when you just wake up and you are unfeeling. You are just indifferent. It’s just – whatevs! You can’t even pick up your phone and check your timeline or if anyone sent you WA messages overnight. Your house could literally be burning down or even worse, your very life- but you just don’t care. In that moment you are just a ball of – nothing? The kind of sadness where you don’t even eat, not because you are not hungry, but because you couldn’t be bothered.

And then maybe you get out of bed. You dress up. Put your make up on. Put some oil on your beard or whatever. Pick your best heels, the ones your girlfriend convinced you to buy when you were trying to fill that deep hole in your heart. ‘Girl, they make your legs look like sin!’, she said, and so you bought them. Or your best tie. The one your girlfriend got you for your birthday and when you wore it for the first time, that girl at your office said it makes you look so handsome and dashing. And so on the days when you need a pick me up- you go to that careful corner where you stash it, you take it out and you wear it and strangers smile at you and compliment you and in that moment – you feel seen. You smile your day away. You think you might actually be happy. You laugh and you make jokes with your friends. For a moment, just for a moment, you find some peace.

But you get home. And it’s all quiet. And you get into bed. And you try to pray, oh how you try. But somehow, it doesn’t feel right. You are unable to feel enough to make you actually formulate the prayer. I am reminded of this poem that l heard a few weeks back that talks about how it is one thing to ask for help, but a whole other thing to have the ability to put it into words. I hope someone assures me that sometimes we don’t always have to put prayer into words? That God just hears what’s in our hearts?

Sometimes we just don’t know where to put the sadness. But it goes away eventually, right? I mean it has to – right? But then again, l hope you find the courage to honor yourself by letting others help you – most of us are broken anyway, some by others and some by life – it is what it is. But in our journeys of survival, we help others survive too. Oh, and remember to take it one ‘are you fucking kidding me’ at a time. And go and listen to Lee Ann Womack’s I hope You Dance. I also hope tomorrow you wake up and not feel the need to wear your best heels or your best tie. Bye now. Till next time.

SMH! It’s ended again!

I am generally good at a couple of things. Like editing. Cooking. Except boiling eggs, they give me so much anxiety! What if they are still runny? Yuck! (I digress) Giving advise. Breaking an awkward silence (sometimes). Giving warm hugs. Being present for people. Starting a fire. But talking about myself, l have been bad at it for as long as l can remember. I just never know how to start. Or maybe, just maybe, this is because l am trying to exist as far away from myself as l can?

Anyway, that’s not the point of this post. So, l’m sitting on the couch this afternoon. Half hungry. Contemplating if l should make proper hot lunch or just have a peanut butter sandwich with cold Mazoe when l come across a quote that says that maybe there are some people who are just not meant to be in lasting relationships. And l think to myself, God! I hope that’s not true! If you ask any of my close friends, they will tell you that l am just downright terrible at relationshipping! Just the other day, l was telling one of them to stop asking me the names of the guys l talk to- truth is, they never really last for long but my friends don’t forget names so they will keep asking me about these ghosts and honestly that’s just sad(inserts SMH emoji). So, no names until it’s absolutely necessary and it’s looking like it might actually last for more than a month.

So, l’m just here thinking, isn’t it funny how relationships end though? Sometimes in the middle of the sentence. While you are still trying to get a hold of the right words, so you can lay them at your lover’s feet to make them understand you better. Sometimes after the full stop. With nothing else left to say. Just the natural death that often times befalls plants that have been under watered one time too many. They wilt under their parent’s watch. And so, the relationship wilts and just…dies. Maybe this is the best ending?

Some people are in your life for the character development. And sometimes you wake up and realize that you have outgrown the person you love (in my opinion, this is the worst). You are just on two different paths. Your person just doesn’t fit anymore. Months later, you think about the day it all ended. You remember the silence after the words had been uttered. The way it took up space. And nothing else could be said after that. You just take your luggage and go. Well, l don’t always pack up and leave. I have often overstayed in spaces that didn’t need me anymore. With people that didn’t know me or want me anymore. I really don’t let go easily. In retrospect though, these boys were not that amazing, l just happen to have attachment issues.

Also, it has taken me some time to realize that not everything in life ought to have a beautiful ending. It doesn’t matter sometimes how much you love people- sometimes they are just not meant to stay in your life. Some are meant to teach us how to love, some how not to love. How not to settle. How to love ourselves more. And oftentimes people leave because this is the nature of humans. We are always learning and growing and so forth. And that’s ok too because they open up space for new people to come and love you.

For the most part though, l wish my exes good things. All the beautiful things that they wish for themselves. But of course, there are those that l wish a lifetime of nothing but dull, brown clothes, unsweetened tea with the everyday bowl of boiled rice accompanied by nothing but Rabroy Tomato sauce. I don’t hate them. They just deserve it (inserts emoji-you can pick an appropriate one).

I don’t know how to end this post. So l am just gonna hope that you are in a happy relationship and l hope you are absolutely basking in it! Till next time kids!

The unlearning.

I think being noisy in the morning is a major character flaw! I don’t even wanna talk because l am still trying to get my attitude together please! There’s nothing like ‘l’m a morning person’. Come on! Mornings are for grounding yourself and thinking about how your night was and what you wish to accomplish on this new day! Well, at least that’s what l have taught myself. I wake up, pray, remove my phone from Do not Disturb/Airplane mode (depending on how l fell asleep last night), brush my teeth and then start thinking about talking to other people. This is just one of the little things l have taught myself in this journey of unlearning.

Thing is, no one ever prepares you for the unlearning that you have to go through as you grow older. Firstly, l like to think unlearning is not about disrespecting or undermining the teachings we got growing up. Part of the unlearning experience for me led to me understanding that it’s ok to be unconventional and that l don’t necessarily have to experience life the way l have been told to. It is ok for me to decide what this soul’s human experience will be like. We are all different souls and surely our human experiences can’t be the same? I am learning that my life does not need to revolve around the approval of others. See, we grow up being told to worry what people will think about what we are wearing, what they will say about our hair, about our posture, our weight, our looks, our smiles, our dreams, us. Think of it, maybe getting the blonde hair was my own tiny attempt at rebellion?

I have also learnt that it is one thing to ask for help and another to have the ability to put it into words. Sad, isn’t it? I read a quote once, that said, ‘Somewhere between narrating every incident to our mothers and keeping things to ourselves, we grew up.’ How devastating? We narrated our falls, the scraped knees, the broken teeth and our feelings about being bullied until we stopped and then we just didn’t know how to talk about the shattered hearts and compromised self esteem. I think for me it’s because l never had any older someone tell me about their youth. I wish the older generations talked about how it was for them. Maybe I just want my struggles to be to be validated before l find the words to express them? I want to be told that yes, the loneliness and the growing up are inextricably linked but that the years also get better. That it all gets better.

I’ve also come to the realization that l may have stolen from other people. Little pieces of their lives. Of their hearts. Of their ability to love, where l have wasted their time or when l have hurt them. It is all part of understanding that there are people that have had to learn to survive me. Are you aware that humans can be hurricanes too? Have you been a hurricane too?

On the brighter side, I’ve also learnt that when l have been offered an apple, sometimes l should dare to demand the orchard. I should also never, ever be afraid to wear all my unique pieces at once. Oh, and sometimes, closure arrives on a sunny Friday afternoon. You are sipping on a glass of wine (or whatever makes your bum hum), and you just feel at peace with yourself. You just know that your closure has arrived. And other times, the only closure you really need, is understanding that you just deserve way better. And some days it hits you that maybe you are not depressed. You just haven’t felt happiness since you were 12. And now you are 20 whatever and just…existing? I hope you get your old happiness back. And l hope you are gentle with yourself during this unlearning process. I hope your unlearning doesn’t involve tears and heart ache. And may the odds forever be in your favor. Remember, you are good enough. (You are probably overqualified but let’s start the week off humble, yeah?) Au revoir!

Little things that warm my heart

It’s been a heavy few months. Every single day, l wake up to my timeline filled with condolence messages. I know a lot of people who have lost someone close to them. I think we have all lost someone this year. I think it’s also easy to slip into the sadness and stay there. I know l have been staying in the sadness. I was tempted to be sad again today. Like yesterday and the day before and the day before. Anyway, l’m sure you get the picture. So, l decided instead to think about the things that make the little lights in my heart flicker. Please refer to Little Lights by Passenger – beautiful song.

It’s little things that keep the little lights on. So, some night in March this year, before everything went to shit, l went out for a meal with this friend of mine. It was late at night and it was getting chilly. So as he was driving me home, l casually mentioned that l was getting cold. So he drove us to Pariah and got me a coffee. This warmed my heart. It was a tiny gesture of kindness but it’s stayed with me for months. Please note that this was not even about the coffee itself. We were already close to my house. I would have been warm in just a few minutes. It’s the thoughtfulness behind the gesture. It signals care and that, ‘l hear you when you speak.’ I would like to believe that it is a beautiful thing to live your life knowing that people hear you and they like to make your life better in any way they can. It is quite heartwarming.

I also like receiving random selfies from my friends because l love seeing their faces but sometimes l am not in the mood for video calls. And when someone sends me a meme or a quote and says I thought of you, my heart definitely does a cute little dance (adds emojis). I love getting a heartfelt thank you because l believe l also express heartfelt gratitude. I also love the smell of rain. Emotional books. Ice cream cones. A slice of Tiramisu. Little dogs. Best friends. Good music. French kisses. Coffee, because therapy is so expensive. Shenanigans in the afternoon. Swings. Snort laughs. Double beef burgers with extra cheese. The giggle of a one year old. Love notes. Peanut butter sandwiches. My best friend’s voice notes. Netflix and chill. Sleepovers. Movie dates. ‘Good morning sunshine’ messages. Caterpillars that remember to turn into butterflies. I hope l never take any of these things for granted. They keep my little lights on. What keeps the little lights in your heart on?

An alternate, simpler universe.

In an alternate universe, I am a 26 year old, completely in love with her life. I am curious and l ask questions knowing they will be met with truth. I am not an anxiety-ridden, sometimes self loathing individual with self esteem issues. l wake up every morning feeling fresh and full of hope. All my dreams valid. I worry not of what people think of me. I am my own person here. My concerns are met with patience and love. I do not wake up in the morning checking to see if that risky text l sent last night did get a reply. I do not send risky texts here. I am confident. I address issues like an adult. I do not leave little notes on the beds of boys because l am scared of confrontation.

I go for lunch dates with my girlfriends and we talk about loving ourselves and trade skin care routines over dessert. There’s no space for conversations about boys in this table. We have so much more to talk about. We drive home, our bellies full and our hearts bursting with love.

I have no regrets here. I have loved and never lost. My heart is handled by hands that understand that l come with a sticker that says, ‘Fragile, handle with care.’ Gentle hands. In this alternate universe, Sundays are spent with the love of my life. We do not go anywhere on Sundays. We eat too many strawberries and too much ice cream, argue about whose turn it is to cook, watch terrible movies and laugh at each other’s bad jokes as we try to find the meaning of life on each other’s lips. On weekdays, I write and receive love letters filled with good intentions. I have no bad days here. All is right in the world.

In this, my current universe, l think l was born to give more love than l will ever see in return. I meet men who are chain smokers and l am nothing more than just another pack of cigarettes. Sometimes, read as most times, l feel like l am not actually home for anyone. I am a welcome pit stop. For gas and snacks. But l am not actually what anyone is looking for. Does that make sense?

I have fallen in and out of love with many people. Unintentionally sometimes- it’s 2am in the morning and my cheeks hurt from laughing so hard and l am so happy for the first time in a long time and l already know that this will hurt. It will hurt when he leaves. I hope the next time l see the signs, l don’t ignore them. I hope l don’t force things. I hope l pack up and go. I hope l have mastered the art of leaving at the right time before l get damaged.

And so, on bad days, l wonder when grief started liking me more than joy. I can not point out the exact moment. I write this and share it because l want it to be ok for us to say that there are things and people and experiences that we have not survived. There are wounds and mistakes we don’t yet know how to heal from and forgive ourselves for. When will we learn to touch our wounds in forgiveness?

My heart breaks for everyone who lays in pain at night and wishes for an alternate universe where they don’t have to wonder why they couldn’t have been enough. An alternate universe where they never have to get fixed because they have never been broken. They fall, knowing they will be caught by partners with hands and hearts big enough to house them and their dreams. I hope that in your current universe you get what you wish for. I hope you are loved intentionally. I hope you meet someone and they just fit in your life- effortlessly. I hope you give and receive just as much. I wish you road trips with the love of your life. If you get 5 loves of your life in your one lifetime, that’s ok too. Experience people and be happy with that too. I hope they make you laugh till you get hiccups and tears run down your cheeks. I hope unadulterated happiness finds you and stays with you. I hope you stop letting people who don’t care why you are the way you are into your life. I hope you meet someone who cares if you ate, who never tires of hearing how your day went, who wants to know all the tiny mundane details of your life. I hope that person learns the things that make you, you. Some people will like the idea of you but fail to handle the reality of you. They will not know how to deal with you when you are sad, they will be unable to understand how somedays you do not want to talk, how you get anxious about meeting new people when they try to introduce you to their friends. I hope you meet someone who understands when your soul is tired and also knows that you are more than just your degree and your achievements, you are a vessel of intense emotion and you are perfectly comfortable being that person. I hope you meet people who have been waiting to meet you too. I wish the same for myself. Have a happy Sunday.

Cold bread and sweet sour milk- a no.

Beloved, in my universe, sugar does not belong on sour milk. It’s sour for a reason. And there’s absolutely no reason why you should put bread in the fridge!!! It stays fresh for days. And how exactly do you eat it cold? Do you warm it up or something? Anyway, it’s none of my business but if l do come to your house please don’t serve me bread from the fridge? And if you become my boyfriend, you gonna learn to keep it outside the fridge, yeah? Thanks.

Me thinks these should be a part of those oh so important first date questions! Little disclaimer, l don’t go to a great many first dates. First of all, l don’t meet lots of people because l am socially awkward and l just don’t really like new people- that’s bad, l know. It is what it is. So, l asked a few friends what their important first date questions are- l shall not offer much commentary! I’m just gonna pick a few, in no order of importance.

1. What’s your level of education and where do you work? If you were to lose your job, what’s your plan? Apparently this talks to one’s intellect and also has to do with brand alignment and such- if you don’t know what that is, then you probably need to google it, yes?

2. What do you think about feminism, race and civil rights? I’m also inclined to add political affiliation- especially if you are in Zimbabwe. I know you get my drift.

3. Financial stability – are you able to take care of yourself? Are you financially responsible? Also, if you are a guy, are you able to provide for your woman? Before you get your pants in a knot- this is about y’all wanting to be providers. So, can you provide? And well, this is more than just about boyfriend-girlfriend relationships, apparently people carry their habits into marriage-‘if he can’t provide now, how do l know that he will be a father who knows how to provide?’ Direct quote.

4. 90 day rule anyone? What’s your opinion on sex? Open quote- You gonna make me wait 90 days or what? – close quote.

5. Are you married? If answer is yes, ask if he’s sure. Beloved, this is important-sometimes they forget their wives.

6. Proceed to ask- is there someone who thinks they might be married to you or in a relationship with you?

7. My most favorite- do you know love languages? Do you know yours?

8. Have you healed? You looking for a rebound? Entanglement? Relationship? This particular question is good for your mental health.

9. Cats or dogs? I don’t trust cat people, but l also don’t trust people who don’t like pets at all. Don’t come for me, l said what l said.

10. Why do you use shorthand at your big age? Honestly- this isn’t the Mxit era mntase.

Please note that most are from women. Apparently, men are not so picky, eh? Or they really don’t have standards. *not my words🌚. Well, my most important questions involve sour milk and bread. Also, l really can’t wait till everything opens up because l would really like to go on a first date before this year ends! I also wish you successful first dates😅! Do you think we should move them to Zoom maybe?

Just rambling

So, yesterday was my birthday and it just didn’t go the way l thought it would. At all. It wasn’t a good day- actually it was a frustrating day. I don’t even think it was about the day itself though. I think it might have been because l just really, really didn’t think this is where l would be on my 26th birthday- to be honest, it’s not a good space. Physically l’m in July, emotionally and psychologically though? I’m still stuck in March wondering how it all went to shit because wow! It really is shitty as hell right now. When l think about it though, 2020 really did start well for me- l was in a good space between January and March. I learnt a new language and l met awesome people. I was just in a good place man (sigh). But WE MOVE.

Fast forward to this morning, l am listening to one of my favorite songs-Sleep on the Floor by The Lumineers (totally love their music)- in that song there’s a line that says, ‘if you don’t leave now, you may never make it out.’ Has it ever occurred to you? That if you don’t pack up your shit and leave right now, you may NEVER make it out? This applies to everyone really- in all aspects of life. Why do we settle? Shitty coffee, shitty man (or women), shitty jobs? Or maybe it’s because we are taught to stay? If you leave, where will you go? Life seems to ask. We are so addicted to the comfort of the known. The unknown scares us. But what if the unknown is where you are meant to be? Anyway, l didn’t say leave your job. There’s the Covid to think of right now and it’s actually responsible for some part of this introspection. We have had so much time to sit and think about our lives. How short they actually are. Of course we are not dead but are we really living these days or we are just trying to survive? And if you and l were to die today, do you think the people that would cry at our funerals would cry because they would miss us or because they know that we had more to achieve and more to experience? Well, when l die l hope people celebrate my life and say that l did it all because l intend to live it fully. I have accepted that sometimes birthdays are shitty but they should never take away from the gift of life. As Mary Oliver said- it is a serious thing to be alive this fresh morning in this broken world. So today, l will be happy, l will not let the worries of yesteryears permeate my aura. I will live today and the next day and the day after and on all the days that come. And l will speak and live my truth on each and every one of them.

For the longest time l have been tearing myself up into tiny little pieces just so people won’t choke on me. I’ve decided that l am not that girl anymore. One of my favorite poets, Becca Lee said, ‘The ocean does not apologize for its depth and the mountains do not seek forgiveness for the space they take. So, why do you?’ So why do l? Sometimes l’m such an apologetic person. A bare minimum hun, if you would. SMH! It’s embarrassing. Anyway, this is out of context and l will talk about it next time! But today- l hope you live. I hope you do one thing that makes you happy. And if the only worthwhile thing you will do today is take a shower- then please, take it and stay in that hot water for as long as possible. Unless you are in Zimbabwe and you are having a bucket bath. Ain’t no staying in the water pal! Tomorrow might be a better day. Check on your friends today. Call them. Tell someone how much they inspire you. You may never know what saves a life today. Tell your parents how much you love them. And if you miss someone, reach out. Life is short. But you are here now. Live it. And if you see beauty in something, do not wait for other people to agree. Savor it. Will you live today?

I couldn’t think of a title.

I’m weird. I like my money facing the same way. I like my doors completely shut when l go to bed. Who leaves the closet door open anyway? What if the monsters come out and get you? I prefer the lights off. I hate it when cars drive past at night- they make the dogs bark and the lights dancing on the curtains distract me. I like listening to sad songs. Heartbreak songs. I sing along to them when l’m cooking. I wish l had a great voice. I’m vocally wounded. I apologize to everyone who’s ever heard me sing. I love cooking and l hate all the other chores. With a passion. But if you know my mother, you already know that l do them. I do them very well with my tail tucked in between my legs.
I text 4 times in a row and l emphasize texts by typing all CAPS and l send a million emojis. I like to think that means l’m just an expressive individual. I hate shorthand, poor punctuation and bad grammar. I always itch to correct those. I hate small talk.
My happiness comes from garlic bread, ice cream, Mac and cheese and potatoes in any form! At the grocery store, l do the stupid dance so that the cleaner can see how sorry l am to be walking all over her wet floor. So l make it look like l am walking over hot lava. I say hie and thank you when l get to the check point. Momma taught me manners. She greets everyone. God bless her soul.

On days when l am feeling particularly lazy, l squeeze the toothpaste in the middle but l never leave the cap off. I tour the yard whilst brushing my teeth. I do not speak to anyone before this morning ritual has taken place. I either eat too much or too little. I sometimes spend 5 minutes tops in the bathroom, you can blame the mission school l went to. Till today, the thought of bathing with cold water traumatizes me. 13 year old acne free Nonty was braver.

I don’t really like watching comedies with other people. I don’t like obvious humor. So much pressure to laugh, what if l don’t find it funny? I prefer thrillers. Edge of the seat stuff!

Someday l want to ride a motorbike and feel the air on my face while l’m giggling and feeling happy. Unadulterated happiness. I think l would like to buy myself a Camaro. I also want to learn how to play the guitar and how to ride a horse. I want to see the Northern lights and then go and ride a gondola in Venice. I want to see The Lumineers in concert. I want to experience life. I want to be so enthusiastic about life that it drips from the pores on my face. I want to take no prisoners in my search for what sets my soul on fire. I want to hurl myself into places and things and people and not feel like l tripped and crash landed! I plan to live out the rest of my life standing in the light of vulnerability and authenticity. I would like to meet myself from someone else’s point of view. I mean, aren’t we all unedited versions of ourselves, waiting, hoping and praying someone else will tell us we make sense?

Little BIG truths.

I was born on a Sunday, the 10th of July. That makes me a Cancer. They say we are highly intuitive, which l agree with. I pick up energies. My momma says it was windy the day l was born. Prophetic much? See l feel like all my life l’ve been ducking tiny little storms after tiny little storms but that’s a story for another day. I’m a hundred and sixty centimeters tall. A whole five feet and some 4 inches on top. I weigh 53kg. Yes. I’m underweight. I know. I’ve been told l could have made a great model. Apparently, l have the body. I think l am too old for that now. It might have occurred to me years back when l was younger but l used to care what people would think and unfortunately, l’m an ambivert now. See, anxiety has done that to me. I don’t know which side of my personality l will wake up on on any given day. Like yesterday, l went to bed an extrovert- l woke up an introvert. It’s confusing. I’m still finding my way too. I’ve been told that l am not an easy person to be with. I’m clumsy sometimes. I say the first thing on my mind and regret it afterwards-l’m still learning to get rid of the regret though. I ask a lot of questions too. I have a curious mind and l have decided to stop apologizing for it. I believe l’ve been a letter sent to the wrong address way too many times. The result: l’ve been read by people who had no idea what to do with me. That hasn’t stopped me from wanting to be delivered to the right address though. See, this Carlifornia King sized heart is also a parachute that always, always fails to open up at the right time. I crash land into people’s lives. You already know what that means.

But l also love napping on rainy afternoons as the sound of raindrops lulls me to a deep, dreamless sleep. Or reading a good book while curled up on the couch or bawling my eyes out watching a chick flick and hiding the tears from my people. I’m human. I love ice cream and l love long, warm hugs. I take black coffee but l have my cereal with way too much milk. I Iove too much or too little- it’s a mess really. I’m still working on finding a balance. I fall for tall boys who smile with their teeth. I’ve been told that l have a resting bitch face, forgive me l’m just nervous and l used to have big teeth. I ‘grew into them’. As l am still growing into the best of me. My journey involves editing my life story and forgiving myself for all the ways l used as medication to deal with my pain. Pray tell, what is your drug of choice?

Oh and hie everyone, my name is Nonty and l have been been self discovering for 25 years now.

Broken Crayons.

I remember reading once that the saddest thing is that with people, unlike with clocks, you can never really tell when they stopped ticking. Sometimes you don’t even know that people are broken. We are all broken, in tiny but oh so significant ways. Sometimes we don’t know it. Sometimes we do and we acknowledge it. But saddest of us all, is the one who knows it but fails to acknowledge it. You see, the thing with truth and brokenness is that the truth makes us uncomfortable and it leaves us bare and naked and vulnerable. Truth is messy and raw and we don’t want to hear it.

How many times do you ask how someone is with the intention to listen? I’ve learnt and accepted that people don’t ask that question to find out how we really are. If this is not the most ‘unanswered’ question, then l don’t know what is. But then again, it’s hard to tell people that you are actually not doing well because watching them not know how to respond makes you feel worse. I was tempted once when someone asked me how l was doing and I was honest and vulnerable and l shared something deeply personal and they told me that they didn’t think they could be able to handle me. It hurt. But l understand because people don’t want to be honest with themselves and l expected this person to carry the weight of my own trauma? I’m too trusting sometimes. So, do you blame people for not telling you how they really feel? Today, l hope you ask someone how they are doing-ask with the intent to listen. But if their truth might be heavy on your soul, cut yourself some slack. We are sometimes unprepared to deal with other people’s brokenness because we have not yet faced and acknowledged our own truth.

But, does the brokenness mean we are undeserving of love? Anyway darling, remember, broken crayons color the same.